Communication and cultural differences

- Communicating with your colleagues can be complicated. Some are incredibly blunt and others are so subtle, it's hard to understand what they're getting at. Some only focus on the exact words you say, while others are constantly hunting underneath the surface to see if there's a hidden meaning. We all have our own communication style and tendencies and it can be complicated even further when folks come from different countries or cultures and may have different expectations about how to communicate. What's most important is to treat each person as an individual and recognize that if you take the time to understand how they personally like to communicate, it's a lot easier to make sure your message is getting through. Here are a few quick tips based on work I've done with my colleague, Brandeis University Professor, Andy Molinsky. First, it's useful to consider whether your colleague emphasizes relationship building in business or straight up transactions. Some people don't feel a need to have a personal relationship with you in order to do business with you, as long as you conduct yourself fairly and ethically, you can get the deal done and they may even actively avoid getting too personal. You've heard the saying, "Don't mix business and pleasure," or, "Don't do business with your friends." That's what those folks would argue. But for other people, there's much more emphasis on personal relationship building. Maybe the client wants to go out to dinner with you and hear about your family and your background. Business and personal life aren't so separate. In their case, the business deal is the culmination of building that personal connection. If you have a colleague with that worldview, it may pay to take the time to get to know them, invite them out for meals, learn about their family, and you'll build a lot more trust. Another key difference is how direct someone's communication style is. If your colleague is really direct, they may say, "The project's in trouble, it's not going to be ready on time." Some people might interpret that as being aggressive but in their minds, they're just being clear. Meanwhile, you have a middle ground where people might say, "I'm really concerned about the project, the timetable may slip." And if someone is a more indirect communicator, they may place a lot of value on being delicate and not offending you. In that case, they may say something like, "The team is working very hard but the timeline may be difficult." That's the same information but conveyed in very different ways, and it may be easy to misinterpret if you're not looking for it, so be aware. Another area to keep in mind is the person's level of formality versus informality. Some people in some corporate cultures are pretty informal, whether it's dressing casually or calling the CEO by their first name. In other cultures, there's much more deference to superiors and you're likely to use their titles at work, like Chairman so-and-so, or Ms. X. Acting too informal in that context might make you appear cocky or presumptuous. We all come with different expectations around communication and what's appropriate, but having an awareness of these differences can help you communicate with more confidence and increase the chances that your intended message will get heard.